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[personal profile] turante
Thought, planned and written in a day.
Quickly patched up by croc <3.

I give you a much needed... fistfight.


Rating: Pg-13 (for language and violence)
Characters: Sherlock, Lestrade, John
Word Count: 1000
A/N: betaed by the lovely [livejournal.com profile] crocodile_eat_u
Summary: Lestrade, Sherlock, a fistfight (a doctor) and a punchline.
Title: Insert Punchline Here


Sherlock recoiled from the punch, wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, took a step back and laughed; laughed loudly and heartily. “Who knew you had it in you!” he said, his voice ringing with mirth and excitement. He resumed his guard and smirked at his adversary. “Come on, show me you weren’t just lucky this time. Hit me again. If you can.”

Lestrade lifted the hem of his t-shirt, already drenched, and wiped the sweat from his brow before it could sting his eyes. He was in good shape and quitting smoking had improved his resistance a bit, but by now, he was breathing hard. “Luck,” he said, grinning at the equally sweating and panting man in front of him, “has nothing to do with me kicking your skinny arse—”

He rushed forward and took a swing at the place where Sherlock’s jaw had been moments before. A hard fist collided with his stomach and he bent in two, holding his middle and hissing in pain.

“You need to spend more time at the gym, Lestrade,” Sherlock taunted, gesturing at him to get up and ready himself for more.

“Maybe,” Lestrade said, standing up and sidestepping, Sherlock mirroring him so that they were circling each other, studying one another before the next strike. It was always Lestrade who made the first move and seeing how that had gone so far, he decided that it was time to change the pattern. “Maybe I need to get serious.”

He waited for the next move. Sherlock smiled, his eyes darting to the left and Lestrade prepared himself to dodge the punch.

To his surprise, Sherlock’s fist hit his face, meeting his jaw as he tried to avoid the blow he had expected to come from the other direction.

“Fuck.” He spat on the floor, blearily noticing that it was red with blood. Who knew a man like Sherlock could hit so hard?

Sherlock waited until he righted himself, then went for another punch, but this time Lestrade managed to intercept. He grabbed Sherlock’s hand and slid a foot forward to trip him. Sherlock, who was already unbalanced from lunging forward, lost his balance and fell, dragging Lestrade down with him.

Down under him, to be precise.

Lestrade was sharply reminded of every bony joint Sherlock had because they were digging into him. He had a knee pressing against his thigh, an elbow against his collarbone and the other jabbing him in the side.

Sherlock laughed again, exhilarated and high on adrenaline. It was catching and Lestrade found himself laughing along with him. He should have grunted and pushed Sherlock off him. But instead he laughed at the situation, at the position they were in and at the pain setting in his muscles and his face.

“You hit bloody hard for such a scrawny guy,” he panted between bouts of laughter and more heavy breaths.

“I am not scrawny, I’m lithe. And I thought you’d be more fit,” Sherlock replied, boyish glee lighting up his eyes.

Lestrade let his hand go and tried desperately to stop staring at the red, split lip on Sherlock’s face he was responsible for. “I managed to parry and catch some blows. I even hit you once. I don’t think I fared too badly.”

Sherlock leant down on him and whispered on his lips “I think you can do better.”

Then John bloody Watson walked through the door of the gym and Sherlock got back up on his feet, not even offering him a hand up. “Same time next week, inspector?” Sherlock asked, bending to get past the ropes and off the ring.

Lestrade replied a weak “yeah,” as he scrambled to his feet, wincing at his sore muscles.

Sherlock walked in the direction of John, who shot him a disapproving look before opening his medical kit. “Sit down and let me have a look at that,” he commanded and Sherlock incredibly complied, letting the other man order him about and touch him in order to patch him up quickly. “You too, Lestrade,” John ordered without turning and continuing to swab disinfectant on Sherlock’s cuts.

“Yes, doctor.” So Lestrade grabbed a towel, dried some sweat off him and joined them in a corner of the gym, waiting for his turn to be manhandled and patched up.

As soon as John’s fingers left his skin, Sherlock jumped to his feet and went to the changing rooms, removing his damp t-shirt as he went. Lestrade followed him with his gaze before he could catch himself; John noticed, but chose to say nothing, opting for grabbing one of his hands and focusing on it.

“At the very least, you could have used boxing gloves...” John scolded him, knowing perfectly well that the same argument delivered to Sherlock would have gone completely unnoticed.

“We... sort of got caught in the moment,” Lestrade answered, a bit ashamed, massaging his neck with the other hand. “Ow, he sure can pack a punch. I’ll be so sore tomorrow.”

John shook his head and took hold of his chin, examining the newly forming bruises on his face. “I don’t doubt it. And these,” he touched Lestrade’s eyebrow and the corner of his mouth, “will show. I’ll get you some ice.” He grabbed a pack from the box and pressed it to Lestrade’s face. “At least I’m glad it’s not me he’s using as a punch bag.”

Lestrade smiled and his eyes crinkled at the corners, thinking about the things he let Sherlock use him for. This wasn’t even the strangest. “Yeah, you should feel lucky.”

When John was done he patted Lestrade on the shoulder and the man winced slightly.

“I’ll be here next week too,” John said, leaving to follow Sherlock out. “Next time, try to punch him more than he punches you.”

As if that hadn’t been Lestrade’s idea from the moment he had accepted Sherlock crazy offer:

“You, me, a real fistfight. Beat me and I’ll let you fuck me.”

Date: 08/12/2010 23:35 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stellary.livejournal.com
Very nice! Like an interlude in a movie with close-ups and quick cuts. There's a nice balance among the three. And the last line made me snicker.

Date: 08/12/2010 23:47 (UTC)
ext_414334: Arthur (Default)
From: [identity profile] turante.livejournal.com
Thank you! *stupid grin*

Date: 08/12/2010 23:41 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] 2ndskin.livejournal.com
AHAHAHAHA! I was not expecting that punchline!!! Wonderful!!! Nicely done with the back and forth--both conversation and hitting! Nice little interlude with the doctor, and oh please, please, aren't you going to have fistfight #2 where Lestrade wins???? You and croc are a lovely team!

Date: 08/12/2010 23:55 (UTC)
ext_414334: Arthur (temptation find me)
From: [identity profile] turante.livejournal.com
:D Yep, she indulges me, but she didn't inspire the fistfight. (She inspired a very vivid dream of Mycroft letting Lestrade do naugthy things to him, though) She did bear with my appalling grammar and lack of epic words...

I was going a bit Palahniuk-y with this fic (but I only realized it upon re-reading), I'm glad you liked it and that I surprised you with the punchline :P

Lestrade, winning a fistfight against Sherlock?
Well, he seems motivated enough :D
(I don't know, though...)

Date: 09/12/2010 00:07 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] 2ndskin.livejournal.com
come on, woman! Lestrade has been a cop--chasing down bad guys at hitting them and throwing them up against walls for 20 years! he knows how to fight! he's been fighting since he was a kid, no?
what does Sherlock do all day? lounges around in a dressing gown THINKING. or tapping on the computer or demanding other people bring him tea! yes, yes, he's wirey and fast, and can land a nice punch, but . . . I just have to defend Greg's ability to smack the crap out of Sherlock if given half a chance. Remember the fic where they beat each other up in the bathroom? . . . anyway, sorry! forgive the rant! I just . . . oh god. I think I need to write something Lestradey . . . soon.
xxxxxxxxx *kiss kiss*

Date: 09/12/2010 00:13 (UTC)
ext_414334: Arthur (Default)
From: [identity profile] turante.livejournal.com
Remember the fic where they beat each other up in the bathroom?
WHAT? NO, WHERE--GIMME!

/crazy

:) Yes, I know Lestrade is BAMF-y and has been chasing criminals all Sherlock's life (well, more or less), but it's a bit complicated, right? Trying to beat the crap pout of someone you want to shag? (and knowing Sherlock, he'd mean right away)

I think they could hurt each other pretty well if given the chance. But then John would completely freak out.

Yes! Write anything Lestradey!!!
I don't seem to be able to write anything else lately.

S/L violence plus sex (lots of punching)

Date: 09/12/2010 00:38 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] 2ndskin.livejournal.com
this was the first violent sex fic I had read and it had quite an effect on me--got all angsty for a coule of days worrying about the boys! but it's quite awesome, as I recall . . .
http://chocolate-limes.livejournal.com/50498.html#cutid1

Date: 09/12/2010 00:40 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] 2ndskin.livejournal.com
p.s.: would love to dream of Mycroft doing naughty things to Lestrade.
I only seem to be able to daydream about it.
a lot.
while on the subway.
those boys are irresistible.
night night--more dreams tonight, for you, I hope . . .

Date: 09/12/2010 00:46 (UTC)
ext_414334: Arthur (Default)
From: [identity profile] turante.livejournal.com
me too! (the subway fantasies--and random porn writing on the phone *cough cough*)
It was Mycroft's fault...ok, it's always Mycroft's fault.
:D
Night! (even if it's reallt early there, right?)

Date: 09/12/2010 00:57 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] 2ndskin.livejournal.com
yes, early here, but (hello, I am the worst wife and mother every) in about 5 minutes my spouse and kid are getting home and I have to hang out with them for rest of the night. even though . . . sigh . . . I haven't written anything in days and am DYING to write Mystrade pwp in which John *accidentally on purpose* watches. . . . poor me. no smut time!
read that choc limes thing--epic!! and so sweaty! and tell me what you think!

Date: 09/12/2010 21:32 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fengirl88.livejournal.com
excellent punchline! love John patching them up as well...

Date: 09/12/2010 21:35 (UTC)
ext_414334: Arthur (temptation find me)
From: [identity profile] turante.livejournal.com
:) thank you dear!
(yep, poor John, I use and abuse him)

Date: 09/12/2010 21:38 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fengirl88.livejournal.com
he is very long-suffering - on the other hand he's getting quite a lot of sex in this fandom so I think he shouldn't complain too much...

Date: 09/12/2010 21:42 (UTC)
ext_414334: Arthur (writing masturbation porn)
From: [identity profile] turante.livejournal.com
true. I should focus on giving some love to detective inspector Lestrade and Mycroft, right? To even the field?

Date: 08/01/2011 22:05 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] the-tire-swing.livejournal.com
GUH! That punchline is truly awesome but it simply demands a sequel now.

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